You Have Arrived

I hope that the series served as an inspiration and skill builder of how to get the best out of your relationship with your young child. This article completes the series. Well done to all those who followed and applied!


“The only ones around you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.”–Albert Schweitzer

I have a friend who taught me a lesson about joy. He is a public person: That is, the public knows him. (I would guess that 50% of all persons in the Western world recognise his name, and perhaps 95% of those interested in sports.) One of our conversations was about pleasure. What did we do with our spare time? What did we do with those rare moments–rarer for him than for me–that we really had to ourselves? (Keep in mind, he could do anything, go anywhere, have anything that money could buy.) He said, “When I have a moment for myself, I try to use it to find some way to help someone. That’s where I find real happiness. It’s so much more fun than doing something for yourself.”
I’d heard that you can judge a man by what he does with his spare time. I used that criteria and judged this man to be great; maybe more importantly, I judged him to be joyful, because the joy of giving is so deep. The joy comes from losing one’s self in helping others, from dismissing self-worries to make room for other-worries. We make our living by what we get, but we make our life by what we give. Emerson said, “See how the masses of men worry themselves into nameless graves…while, here and there, a great, unselfish soul forgets himself into immortality.”
A personal recollection (Linda’s) may further illustrate the joy:
I remember that a particularly miserable time in my life came when I was in the sixth grade. I was 11 years old, considered my leftover baby fat anything but cute, and wore salmon-coloured “cat-eye” glasses which I abhorred. I sensed that I had no style &, worst of all, thought I had no friends. I was worried about who liked me and who didn’t, and each day I wondered whether or not the one marginal friend I thought I had would be nice to me.
One Saturday afternoon while I was getting ready for a school party, I began telling my mother my feelings. I don’t remember whether I just had not bothered to tell them to her before or whether she had passed them off lightly as childish whims when I had mentioned them. On this particular day, however, she took me seriously and could see that I was really concerned. As I donned my clothes, I said, “Mom, sometimes I feel so left out when I’m with other people. I just can’t think of anything to say and yet I feel so uncomfortable if no one talks to me.”
My mom, in her wisdom, gave me some counsel in those next few minutes that changed my life, “Linda, whenever you are with a group of people who are socialising with one another, look around; just stand back and look around a few minutes, and you will almost always see someone who needs you, someone who is feeling insecure and in need of a friend. You can tell by a look in the eye, a nervous mannerism, someone off by herself. Decide who needs you and then go to them; relate to them, ask questions about them, show them you care!”
This advice was like a miracle drug for my ailing soul. I went to the party. I stood back and observed. “There she is,” I thought as I saw Beverly, the girl with the stringy hair and the buckteeth, sweet but not too bright. Everyone knew that she lived in a strange, broken-down house outside of town with about nine brothers and sisters, equally untidy and shabby. I remember her as though it were yesterday, sitting quietly in a chair, looking at her hands, while those around her giggled and chattered and ignored her. But what will everyone think? I cringed in my immature mind. If I talk to her, everyone will think I’m dumb and “out of it” like they think she is. But my conscience told me it was right, so I walked over to her. Suddenly, instead of muddling in my own misery because I didn’t have any friends, I became her friend. I started by asking questions about her family and farm, and as the party wore on, I felt her warm acceptance and saw the joy in her eyes as she understood that somebody cared about her. But even more important to me, I was needed. I was providing a service to someone that, in time, made me grow to appreciate her. I also noticed that no one shunned me because of my association with her.
The experience gave me such a good feeling that I tried to pick out those who needed someone in other situations. As I began to forget myself in other people, I found that I was surrounded by a host of friends who really liked me for what I was.
If I could instill this in our children at an even younger age, how great their rewards would be. So often we say, “Oh, they’re too young to understand.” I wonder. Try teaching this principle to a four-year-old–you might be surprised.
You might start by performing “services” for each other. Services include anything from helping brother find his socks to letting sister use the new crayons. If we want children to love, we must teach them to serve. Older children can serve their younger brothers and sisters in countless ways!

Dare to Be Different–Poem by Helen Marshall

Dare to be different; life is so full
Of people who follow the same push-pull,
Poor, plodding people who, other than name,
Try to pretend they’re exactly the same.

God made men different; there never will be
A replica soul made of you or of me.
The charm–the glory of all creation
Rests on this very deviation.

Your charm–your own glory, too,
Lies in being uniquely you–
Lies in being true to your best,
That part of you different from all of the rest.

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Quote of the Month

Sunbird’s Quote for the month:

Make it a rule never to give a child a book you would not read yourself.

–George Bernard Shaw

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Welcome to the Outdoor School

If you feel, that your child does not have enough opportunity to play outside, at Sunbird, the children spend at least two hours everyday, learning outdoors, having snacks outdoors and of course have lots of playtime!

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Sunbird Carnival 2015

Dear All Thanks to all the children, parents and visitors Sunbird Carnival was a blast with exciting games, face painting, arts and crafts stall and of course  funny Jockel the Clown. All were in for a healthy treat with Mrs. Sunila’s yummy bakes from undercover bakers. Hope to see more of you soon in our fun place, where learning and happy times don’t stop.

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Just About Done


I once knew a middle-aged man, an accountant, who had a ledger-book-size Christmas-card list. In this thick book all the pages were filled; there were hundreds and hundreds of names. “Business contacts?” I asked. He glanced over, paused for a moment as though considering whether he should tell me something important, then said, “No, they’re relationships.” He anticipated my next question and went on in his accounting terminology, “Every relationship you form, no matter how small, if it is genuine, can be an asset of eternal duration. No other entry can cancel it out. Some of us spend all our time on temporary assets: Money, positions, achievements. We ought to spend more on the eternal assets like relationships. Whenever I earn one, I make an entry on my Christmas card list.”
I watched the accountant closer from then on and found that he practiced what he preached. When he met someone–on a plane, in his business, at a PTA meeting–his attitude seemed to be, “What can I learn from you? What is interesting and unique about you?” For him, life was a fascinating kaleidoscope of relationships, of endless people, each endlessly interesting and each offering more potential joy than a new car or a new position.

How To

General ideas.
1. Develop a tradition of listening. Really listen.
2. Have a sense of humour. Laugh at your own mistakes and laugh with children at every opportunity.
3. Always encourage children to hug and make up after a disagreement.
4. Show romantic love between parents: Holding hands, kissing as you leave, opening the car door, sitting close together, avoiding harsh words, emphasising loving words.
5. Teach and explain the Golden Rule.
6. Role reversal: Let the children play parents and you play child, so they see and appreciate your problems.
1. Speak candidly, graphically, logically to children.
2. Help children write letters–you write what they express. Praise them for phrasing things well.
3. Give lavish praise whenever children explain or say anything particularly well.
4. At dinner, encourage a child to talk about something that he knows a lot about–perhaps something he has just learned and is proud to know.
5. Talk on the phone with children whenever possible.
6. Encourage children to take advantage of any speaking opportunities. Help them really communicate to an audience.
1. Make their relationship with you a truly beautiful one.
2. Talk out disagreements. Sit them down face to face to work out problems or disagreements they have with each other.
3. Don’t always step in on children’s relationships or try to steer them too much–let them work things out. (My children were having a terrific fight in the back seat of our station wagon once when I had laryngitis. I found that they worked it out better on their own than they would have with my direction.)
4. Do something special for your children to stress the importance of your friendship with them. Take them for a drive, or bring them a surprise.
5. Play the game “Which is the better way?” in which children act out a good and bad way of deciding who should have the first turn, getting the dishes done after Sunday dinner etc.

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Dear Parents, Patrons, Friends and Well Wishers

It is with great pleasure, that Sunbird Early Learning Centre, announces the fifth anniversary of its existence. Without your support, belief and input, this occasion would not be happening.
We would therefore like to invite you to the official opening of the new centre on Haralur Road. After a quiet start on the second floor of a clubhouse, Sunbird moved to a first floor apartment and was ‘hidden’ from the world. Although both Centres had adequate space, they were only a step to what we believe we have found in our new place: and 80% outdoor space on the Main Haralur Road. (opposite to Fisherman’s Wharf Restaurant)
Sunbird is a wellknown Early Learning Centre after five years. Our main USP remains as a centre committed to excellence of offering the children unique learning experiences, a low student to teacher ratio, a place with parental interaction, participation and counseling, an opportunity to go for monthly unique field trips, and recently, a place with over 4000 sft of open space to play, learn, plant etc.
Thank you for gracing the occasion, looking forward to seeing you!

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Ready At Last

Dear Parents and Friends

Thank you for your continued patronage over the last 5 years.

Sunbird brings you a learning Centre like quite none other: Believing in the outdoors, we can offer you a place where your child can now go to school in a safe and spacious playground area! Enjoying over 4000 sqft of outdoor space with 500 sqft of sand play area alone, children are reluctantly going indoors for some ‘other type’ learning. The amount of activities outside are unlimited, ranging from races on the 1000 sqft lawn to the ever loved trampolin, and balancing cycles. Introducing shortly with be an organic garden planting, to keep the curious little minds interested. Not to forget that the daily Gymnastic times are now also kept outdoors, there is really not much missing to an amazing playground. Planned still is a traffic area and the swings.

For more pictures, please view the ‘faculty’ section in ‘Gallery’

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Getting There


Last time I tried to give three-year-old Josh a bath, the big new shampoo bottle was empty. “Did you dump it out, Josh?” His brow furrowed as he anticipated the worst. “Yes, Dad.” We have a family law against “dumping,” and Josh knows the law, so he needed a little punishment. But I praised him so much for telling the truth that it outbalanced the punishment.
As I dried Josh, I had candor and honesty on my mind and happened to hear Saren, now six, in whom we had tried so hard to preserve that quality. She was in her bedroom with a new friend from school. They were discussing their dolls.
Saren: “This doll has a problem. Her skirt has lost its elastic, so it slips right off.”
Friend: Let’s tie a string around it.”
(Silence for several minutes.)
Saren: It scares me when Miss Christie calls on me to read in school. Does it scare you?
Friend: A little.
Saren: I’m getting over it, though.
Friend: The more you do it, the easier it gets.
Saren: I guess so. There, we got the skirt almost ready.
Friend: Saren, do you like me?
Saren: Of course, silly. I like everything about you.
Friend: Everything?
Saren: Except I didn’t like it when you played with Patty at recess–but Mommy says I was just jealous.
Friend: What’s jealous?
Saren: Not wanting someone to have more fun than you.
Friend: I like you, too, Saren.
To be honest, to be open, to talk freely about the real feelings–what a joy!

How To

Example. Be as real and open as your children are. Verbalise your real feelings, fears and insecurities as well as your joys and loves. Show control, but show honesty! Tell them how you feel–“I’m upset about what happened this afternoon, so I got angrier with you than I should have.” Never let them hear you lie about anything to anyone.
Reinforcement and praise. Whatever they get attention for, they’ll probably do again; whatever they get praise for, they’ll very likely do again; whatever they get joy and praise out of, they’ll almost certainly do again. Encourage them to always tell how they feel–to tell not only you, but also other family members, teachers and friends.
Honesty discussion. Ask the children, “Do you know what it means to tell the truth?” Add to the children’s answers, if necessary, to bring out that telling the truth means to tell things as they are: What really happened, what you really think and how you really feel.
Questions & Answers. Example of a question: If you accidentally bumped into your mother’s plant and knocked some leaves off it and then told Mother that the baby pulled them off, would that be telling the truth? (No) What would that be? (A lie.)
Before going on to the next situation, ask, “How do you think you would feel if you told a lie?” (Sad, bad, worried, ashamed, awful.)
Another question example: What if you forgot to wash your hands for lunch and your mother said, “Did you wash your hands?” If you said, “No, I forgot,” would that be telling the truth? (Yes.)
Bedtime is a good time for a little honest, important dialogue between parent and child. Years ago we started a tradition of asking each child as he was tucked in, “What was your `happy’ and your `sad’ today?” Children like to think back through the day to recognise and talk about emotions. “My happy was when my friend came over to play,” or “when I got two snacks,” or “when I jumped in the leaf pile,” or “when Daddy came home.” “My sad was when Lisa wouldn’t play with me after school,” or “when I couldn’t hop very well in hopscotch,” or “when I cut my finger,” or “I didn’t have any sads today.”
The answers open up quick, golden chances to talk about real feelings. “How did it feel to play with Susan?” “Why do you suppose Lisa wouldn’t play? Did something sad happen to her?”

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Getting There

Dear parents and friends In case you have been wondering, where Sunbird had flown off to, we have good news: The new premises are just about ready!! Here are the projected last stages: Week 3 May 2015: Interiors finished, Exteriors finished Week 4 May 2015: Ready to accept new students, final adjustments Save the date: 30 / 31 May 2015: CARNIVAL AT SUNBIRD. By next week we shall keep you posted with the exact program for the Carnival.

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More Joys


When I was growing up, I knew a group of brothers and sisters, schoolmates of mine. I was always impressed because they seemed so unconcerned about being with the “in group” or the “right people.” They didn’t even care much about wearing the newest thing, the latest style. They were all friendly, though, and all well liked. They seemed so secure, unafraid of failure.
Each of the six had his own personality, but all possessed one similar quality, a quality that I grew to greatly admire. It was a peace, a calm, a security, a naturalness, a confidence. None of these adjectives quite describe it, but it was there. You could feel it; you knew they had it. I was always interested in where it came from. It wasn’t from individual brilliance, exceptional athletic ability, or particular handsomeness or beauty; they were pretty average in each of these categories. The clue seemed to be in their love and acceptance of each other.
One day an unexpected opportunity came to discover the true source of their confidence. The family moved into a house just across the block from my house. Now, instead of seeing them just in school, I saw them at home, and the secret was revealed! The confidence, the assurance, the security, the unity came from the unconditional love in their home. From the outside their home was ordinary; on the inside it was extraordinary.
I remember the youngest child, who was just turning two. The first words he ever said were, “Ah, mush,” a phrase often used in the family to poke fun at the frequent hugs and pats and physical affection that were shown in the house.
I know now that the secret was in the warmth and acceptance and security of that home–a joy irreplaceable, and unavailable from any other source.

How To

Genealogy. Children love knowing “where they came from” in the genealogical sense. Some ways to convey this are:
1. Frame old family pictures and group them together on a special wall.
2. Draw a simple family tree, with each child as a branch and the parents as the trunk, and the grandparents as individual roots. Put pictures of the parents and grandparents on the trunk and roots and of brothers and sisters on the limbs. Frame it and hang it on the same wall as the ancestor pictures.
Consistency. Children need to be able to depend on certain constants in their lives. There are four areas in which consistency is particularly important:
1. In discipline. If a family law is broken, the punishment or consequence should be automatic, expected & consistent.
2. In example. Make yourself predictable to your children–trying to always do right in their presence, but admitting mistakes.
3. In regular schedules for certain important things such as the evening meal or a weekly family meeting.
4. In always keeping promises.
Constant awareness of promises.
1. Support each other’s activities
2. Show love for your spouse openly. As the saying goes, “The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.”
Family song or chant: “Because We Are a Family.”

Mom always loves me, don’t you see,
Because we are a family.

When I’m scared, Dad holds me on his knee,
Because we are a family.

Who helps each other? You see, it’s we,
Because we are a family.

We hug a lot and kiss…well, gee,
Because we are a family.

We work at becoming the best we can be,
Because we are a family.

We keep our house as neat as can be,
Because we are a family.

We work things out when we disagree,
Because we are a family.

My mom and dad are proud of me,
Because we are a family.

I cheer for my brother and he cheers for me,
Because we are a family.

When someone needs us, we try to see,
Because we are a family!

Display open gratitude for children. How simple–and how incredibly important–it is to let a child know how much he is wanted and needed, how precious and important he is to the family.
Tell the child a simple story about the day (or night) he was born and about how much you wanted him and how happy he made you.

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Hello everybody

Sunbird is offering an amazing range of exciting themes for kids aged 2 – 8 years.

April 2015:

Date: 6th to 30th April 2015

Time: 10 am to 12:30 pm

Venue: Sunbird Early Learning Centre, 145, 29/10 Kasavanahalli, Off Sarjapur Road


Week 1: Art as Tools

Week 2: Under the Sea

Week 3: Weaving/Block Printing

Week 4: History of Writing

May 2015:

Date: 4th to 29th May 2015

Time: 10 am to 12:30 pm

Venue: Sunbird Early Learning Centre, No 46, Shubha Enclave, Haralur Main Road Opp. ‘Fishermen’s Wharf’ Restaurant


Week 1: Seven Wonders of the World

Week 2: You are the light

Week 3: Basics of Engineering sculpture for Kids

Week 4: Flying Object

Call us to register now! See you there!

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Hello Sunbird parents and interested parents

Updates from our Haralur Road project:

The work is in full swing in our new premises. At the moment the outside is getting leveled. Extra care is taken to make sure, the safety standards are upheld. Next week, our interiors are starting. In the last week of April the final touches should transform the school to a welcoming and fun loving place, where children love to be!

We  are planning a celebration at the end of the month. Please stay tuned for the updates!!!

Your Sunbird Team

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Sunbird Graduation Party 2015

Congratulations to all Sunbird students! They made tremendous progress this past year! It showed up, when they performed in various ways for the graduation party. Whether they swung across the monkey bars, completed perfect somersaults, acted out animal movements and sounds, sang ‘do a deer, a female deer’, acted out a drama or danced to catchy tunes, they knew what they were doing and they enjoyed it. There was not one dull moment and the many parents and visitors were proud of their kids!

Thank you dear teachers, you deserve a big round of applause for your tired less work around the clock to incorporate such a show besides the teaching and other responsibilities that you have!

Thank you parents for your support throughout the year which is an integral part of Sunbird’s success! The grand finale of handing out various certificates for exemplary achievements and ‘grade promotions’ was certainly enhanced by the amazing various snacks, pani puri and sweets made with pounded jaggery! Mmhh…

A Happy Holiday to all, both children and parents! For those who are moving on, all the best, and for the ones who stay with us, we will have a big surprise coming up!

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Growing More


I had a favourite professor in graduate school, a man whose every move transmitted a certain, “I’m okay, you’re okay” joy to all who were around him. He had remarkable patience. When a student could not seem to grasp a point, he would not chide or criticise; instead he would compliment the student on some other point where he was strong.
He couldn’t sing or speak well. In fact, he seemed to have few particular abilities, yet he always seemed totally self-confident–not cocky or overbearing, just quietly of the belief that he could discuss anything, do anything.
I did well in his class, in part because I found him so interesting, and by the end of the year I knew him well enough that we had lunch together once in awhile. I asked the source of his confidence. He said there were two elements, the first of which was his faith. He expressed to me, with no hesitation or inhibition, his belief in a higher power to whom he could pray and who he felt would guide and nudge and help him through life.
“What is the second thing?” I asked. “Well,” he said, “I’m a little like the great craftsman who made the finest violins in the World. Stradivari used to say, `God can’t make a Stradivarius without Antonio Stradivari.’ I have certain gifts, and I think I have discovered what most of them are. I am sufficiently confident in two or three basic areas that I feel equal to anyone.”
I’ve thought a great deal about what he said. His joy was confidence. His confidence was a combination of faith and gifts he had discovered. I realised that everyone can have both, that no one is precluded from faith, & no one is without particular, unique gifts.
Children can feel the joy of individual confidence and uniqueness. This fact is often illustrated by children themselves at our experimental Joy School. Early in our first year, while we were dealing with the physical joys, I had an experience that taught me something about the joy of individual confidence. A group of children were dancing, and the teacher was showing them how to skip. I was sitting at the side, observing. There were about ten children, four of whom just could not grasp the technique or coordination of skipping. It intrigued me that three of the four looked dejected, embarrassed and upset because they couldn’t do it. Each of the three, in his own way, stopped trying: One cried, one walked out and one started acting silly and boisterous to distract attention from his failure. The fourth little boy showed absolutely no embarrassment or concern or self-consciousness for not being able to skip. He kept watching, kept trying, kept failing, kept watching, kept trying. When the exercise was over, I asked him some questions:
“Do you like to skip?”
“Yes, but I can’t do it very good.”
“Well, did you wish they’d stop skipping and do something you were better at?”
“No, because I want to learn how.”
“Do you feel bad because you can’t skip?”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m better at other things.”
“Like what?”
“Mommy says I’m good at painting pictures.”
“I see.”
“And I’m ‘specially good at keeping my baby brother happy.”
“I see, Jimmy. Thanks for answering my questions.”
“That’s all right. Don’t worry; some day I’m going to be good at skipping, too.”
An amazing interchange for a four-year-old! But the principle behind it is not particularly amazing–it’s quite natural. A person who is secure in the knowledge that he is good at certain things can much more easily accept the things he is not good at.

How To

Obvious, open, unconditional love. A child who feels an inalterable parental love has a built-in foundation for confidence. He knows no failure, no mistake, will rob him of that love and family acceptance. Tell him of your consistent love.
Know each child well as an individual. You can’t help a child build confidence around his inherent gifts and talents unless you come to know what those gifts and talents are. Two ways to learn: (1) In private chats with the child, time spent together watching and appreciating; and (2) in organised time, spent as husband and wife, discussing each child, sharing perceptions, taking notes, discovering together more about the personality and individual character of each child.
Genuinely respect each child and his own gifts. Our children are human beings, deserving not only our love but our respect. With this thought in mind, sometimes it becomes a bit easier to (1) show an added measure of faith in them after any kind of failure; (2) discuss our own failures with them and tell them what we learned from each; (3) praise their accomplishments lavishly and honestly, particularly accomplishments in areas where we perceive special aptitude; and (4) never criticise or tear the children down personally. We should criticise instead the bad things they have done, making sure they still know our total love for them. Never criticise in public–“praise in public, correct in private.”
Independence, self-reliance, responsibility at an early age. Confidence and its joy tie directly into being able to do useful things. Each child should have a job in the family, for the family–particularly daily or weekly jobs–for which he is praised & made to feel very able and very important, very much a part of the family.
Help the children to see what their own unique gifts are–and that these gifts are as good as anyone else’s.
1. The “one thing I like about you” game: Sit five or six children in a circle, with one in the middle. Let each child say something he likes about the one in the middle, such as “One thing I like about Tommy is that he can tie his own shoes.”
2. Individual profile charts: Trace a profile from each child’s shadow on a poster. Then, under each profile, write in the eye colour, hair colour, sex, age, position in the family, and what the child is good at. Put the posters up on the wall and let each child take pride in his uniqueness.
Special nicknames for each child. A similar feeling of specialness comes with an affectionate nickname, especially when it is used exclusively by one parent. To Daddy, Saren is “Princess,” Shawni is “Pixie,” Josh is “Herkimer,” Saydi is “Sugar Plum” or “Tater Tot,” Jonah is “Boomer Bumpkin,” Talmadge is “Mudgie” and Noah is “Nobie.”
Mommy & Daddy dates. Set aside a special time each week when there is a one-to-one relationship between mother or father (or both) and one child. These occasions may sometimes take planning, and other times they may consist simply of maximising the moment.
“Empty Books.” A dear friend mentioned at the time our first two children were still tiny that she got a great deal of satisfaction from buying an “empty book” (well-bound with empty pages) for each child when he was a baby and recording special events and character changes in the child’s life as he grew. The ultimate plan was to present it to him on his wedding day.
We have followed her example and have found many benefits that we hadn’t planned. The children know we are keeping the books and they feel a great sense of uniqueness and pride in knowing that even though, for the most part, the contents are secret until their wedding day, they themselves are individuals in their parents’ eyes. They see us writing about those special events and are secretly thrilled that we take time for just them. Also, in reading back over events from these first few years, we realise how easily we forget those momentous moments (birth, toddler’s mischief, starting school) in a child’s life unless they are recorded. They’ll make great “vicarious journals” and will be lots of fun for our children’s children to read some day. Reading back through them is also, for us, a chance to evaluate the progress and needs of each child.

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Pat-a-Cake, Pat-a-Cake, Baker’s Man……..

The crowning and final excursion for 2014 -2015 was BAKING!!! Thanks to Sunila, our parent and advocate of healthy loaves, the children started to really love getting ‘into the dough’. At first they all baked a yummy banana bread, that was made with pounded jaggery, brown sugar and whole wheat flour!! The result was perfect as you can see in the picture.

Next, Mrs. Durga Menon, owner of Iluvia Bakery on Sarjapur Road and equally a health food enthusiast, invited the children for a hands on learning how to make a pizza. They kneaded the dough, topped it with tomato paste and cheese and got to eat it in the end. What Fun learning. Thank you mam, the kids loved it and so did the adults!!

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